Four Loves of the Doctor
by m.tarnina
Summary: The difficult part of this was the choice between Doctor's many relationships. A "Four Loves"/character voice exercise, rated this high and no higher because River is wearing a bikini. For now.
1. storge

"Infantile earth girl" the Doctor growled, walking into the kitchen. His many-coloured coat landed on a chair, then slid to the floor. A cabinet door whined. Plates jingled.

He filled the teapot, put it on and stood there, arms folded, staring at the pot's cover in an accusatory sort of a way.

"What is she thinking?"

The TARDIS gave his mind a nudge, not a strong one, but enough for him to look up and yell "Don't you defend her! Or should I remind you whose fault this mess is in the first place? If you wanted to show your support, why not take us where she wants to go?!"

Ignoring the telepathic equivalent of a shrug, he reached for the tea can, which he then put back on the table before wagging his finger at the ceiling. "And since when are you so supportive eh?"

He straightened up, his hands on his hips. The TARDIS answered with a mental impression of a sound, although not very loud.

The Doctor rolled his eyes. Doesn't even sound like Peri, he communicated very clearly. Whose memories have you taken this from? Nyssa's? Polly's? Mine? Sounds familiar. Dirty tricks, my lady.

The TARDIS backed off with a telepathic "sigh".

"Who is being difficult?" The Doctor snarked, taking mugs from the cabinet.

* * *

"Peri?"

She didn't answer, but the door wasn't locked. The Doctor elbowed it open and set his tray on the table, aligning it exactly with the edge of it, alongside the flower press, which was standing very crooked. So he put it straight.

Then he turned to see that Peri hadn't deigned to get out from beneath her covers, off-white like those old sweaters of his. He clicked his tongue.

"Tea is getting cold."

There was mumbling from the bed. "I don't want any."

"I also brought cookies, those with all the various bits in them" the Doctor continued, unabashed. "Well, more for me."

He made a display of taking one and biting into it with a crunch. It didn't taste particularly good, but he kept on munching, until he was sure Peri had resolved to stay under covers. Oh, well. As they say on Earth, plan B.

"Hey!"

Her eyes were swollen like a chameleon's, her cheeks red and blotchy. The Doctor silently folded the coverlet and sat beside Peri on her bed, painstakingly not looking at her tangled hair.

"You might be interested to hear I found out what went wrong."

"With your head?" she muttered, but he ignored it.

"The TARDIS had, not for the first time, decided to disregard my instructions."

The bed springs yielded with a nails-on-a-blackboard moan, and Peri's bare feet flashed at the edge of the Doctor's vision. He took a risk and shot her a glance. She was sitting up, combing her hair with her fingers.

"So, we're lost again?"

What do you mean, again? He wanted to shout, before remembering what he came here for and biting his tongue. He looked at Peri, still red and tousle-headed like a little girl.

"By no means" he said with great surety. "I know exactly where we are."

Peri snorted, very, very softly, and he slapped his hands on his knees before standing up.

"Well then, where to now? The universe is our oyster!"

"Right now" she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand "I'd rather have this tea."

She reached for a cookie, and the Doctor pulled himself a chair.


	2. philia

"Give us some light" muttered Ace through a bunch of wires.

"It isn't that dark yet" the Doctor answered, rummaging in his coat pockets.

"Can't even tell the colour of this... thanks. Okay, done here."

Standing up, she wiped her hands on her trousers, then hoisted her rucksack up to hang it on one shoulder and asked "Where to?"

The Doctor handed her the torch while he unfolded a scrap of paper taken from his hat band and stared at it, squinting. He pulled the note closer to his eyes, then back, until Ace snorted with laughter.

"This way" the tip of the Doctor's umbrella drew a small arch to point into one of the several alleys.

"Shall we?"

Biting back the giggles, she followed him among the stone houses.

"Hmm. That would be... here."

They went into a gateway. In a single movement Ace dropped her rucksack and sat down on the cobblestones, just beside a storm drain.

"Light" she demanded. "Weird, us not running into a patrol."

"Ye, we have had exceptional luck. That's the last charge, and with no hindrance."

"Mhm. Don't jinx it."

"Ace" he said in a mock-resentful tone "'jinxing', as you call it-"

"You're the one who started talking about luck. I'd be calmer, though, if they caught us and made us explain. Daft, aren't I?"

She looked up at the darkened sky before continuing "When the tower falls, there's gonna be a pandemonium, right?"

"Hair-curling scenes."

"Yeah. So I've been thinking, is it gonna be the right guys who get the makeover?"

"Makeover?"

"Oh, you know. Ugh, dumb wire... Guess I'm paranoid..."

"On the contrary, this is a very appropriate question. You'll ruin your teeth."

"I lost the wire stripper."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Had no time" Ace stared at the wire before biting into it and spitting the bits of plastic down the drain.

"Time, some philosophers on your planet claim, is nothing but a way of organisation of mind."

"Really."

"Mhm."

"Get me crocodile clips from my rucksack. How can we travel in it, then?"

The Doctor gave her a handful of crocodile clips from his pocket.

"Another good question. Perhaps everything is simultaneous in the deeper reality?"

"Sure, Professor. What about causality?"

"Right. It appears, Ace-"

She tilted her head for a critical look at her work.

"And what does that have to do with my question?"

"Would you, by any chance, like to see Königsberg?"

"Want to introduce me to Kant?" She stood up, propping herself on one hand.

"Thanks, Professor, but I've read the Prolegomena and that was enough of the guy to last me a lifetime."

The Doctor frowned, pleasantly surprised.

"Maybe you should learn more about his ethics."

"Maybe. What was his view on blowing up dictatorships?"

"True" the Doctor smiled a little. "He might not see the worth of our hard work."

She glanced at him. He sobered up.

"You've asked a good question, Ace, but not one I know how to answer."

"Hah! One thing you don't know."

"Nobody knows everything."

"All we can do is act and hope, yes?"

He tapped her nose. "Exactly."

Hand in hand they vanished in a dark alley.


	3. eros

Ordona Nine had definitely lovely beaches. Miles upon miles of coral sand. Coral, as in made of coral, white, not coral in colour. Of course they landed before the planet was colonized, so Amy, who wanted something besides white sand and turquoise water, pouted a little, but afterwards she and River got into their bathing suits and went swimming, and, at least from afar, they both seemed rather happy. Rory was snoring on a beach chair, in the shadow of a huge, rainbow-coloured umbrella they propped against the side of the TARDIS.

The Doctor gave the last sprinkle of water to the battlements of his marvellous sandcastle he built all by himself. He smoothed the wall of the southern tower. A banner would be nice... Sand isn't the best material for cloisters, though, he thought. It doesn't really stay in one place. Maybe if he mixed it with liquid glass...

He wiped his hands and stood up. Amelia's red head was shining like polished copper against the blue waves, but where was River?

"River!" He called. He can always say he wanted to show her the castle. Fit for a queen.

"River!"

Aphrodite emerged from the sea.

Her head surrounded by a nimbus of purest gold. Gold were her shoulders, round and strong, her figure was drawn with lines of light.

"Sweetie!" she called, and the Doctor shook his head, felt his cheeks burning.

"Don't you want to swim?"

He cleared his throat. "No, thanks!"

"You sure?" River brushed her hair from her eyes, the light shimmered on her wet skin. Truth be told, the Doctor thought, I could do with a nice cold shower.

"Aren't you hot? You haven't even taken your jacket off." River walked closer, a slightly worried look on her face. The black bikini, very minimalist, some could say negligible, accentuated the golden hue of her skin.

The Doctor shook his head. Rule one.

"Uhm. I can see you sweating, you know?"

"Really?" Without thinking, he swept his hand across his forehead.

River laughed a melodious, mellifluous laughter that sent shivers down his spine.

"Have you seen my sunscreen?"

He hastened to look around. River's beach bag was lying open beside the feet of her soundly asleep father.

"On wet skin?" the Doctor asked, grabbing the bag. Then he looked at River and bit his tongue.

"Water-proof. Come and give it to me."

He stopped on the edge of the wet sand, outstretching the hand that held the bag towards her, but River nodded at him, just like the lady of the castle.

And suddenly he was up to his knees in cool water, the sun heating up his head, his hands sliding over curves old man Möbius never even dreamed of, and all there ever was was the sun, the water, River and him. And the taste of salt and caramel on his lips.

"When you take me to the beach" he heard a velvety whisper, "you must be prepared to get a little wet, Sweetie."

"River... Hey!"

The Doctor pushed his wet hair back.

"Mother, dear, have I ever poured water on you and dad?" River asked, putting her arm around him.

"I'm just helping you keep your promise" Amy giggled.

The Doctor and River exchanged glances. Then they exchanged smiles. And then, with perfect synchronisation, they attacked the ginger with cool, salty water.

Sun-rays glinted on the waves, merry like their laughter.


	4. agape

At first all the Doctor felt was pain, in every bone in his body. What happened? He thought. He could swear he heard creaking, grinding noises in the machinery of his own mind. What happened?

He tried to roll to his side. He groaned. Then he remembered.

The Ood. Wilfred. The Master. Everything hurts. And that means... That means...

"I'm alive. I've..."

Hard to believe, huh? My aching bones a proof, he thought. Doleo, ergo sum.

"I'm still alive" he laughed weakly. He felt so battered, such a wonderful, delightful feeling! What would Aristippus say, he giggled inwardly, maybe I'll go and see him? Have a chat over an amphora. Finally an occasion to talk properly. Or maybe...

Four knocks. Simple rhythm. Four knocks on the glass. No. Impossible. But... four knocks again, the rhythm of his hearts. The Doctor hung his head.

As if to mock him, Wilfred tapped his rhythm out again. One, two, three, four. Thanks for the warning, Carmen, the Doctor thought bitterly. Thanks, universe. Nice to know you're grateful.

"They've gone, then?" asked Wilfred hesitantly. "Good-oh. If you could let me out?"

"Yeah."

Wilfred said "Only, this thing seems to be making a bit of a noise."

Mechanically, completely without thinking, the Doctor pulled himself up. The ache in his bones dulled. Maybe just slid from the foreground.

"The Master" of course, the unthinking idiot "left the nuclear bolt running. It's gone into overload."

"And that's bad, is it?"

"No", obviously, "cause all the excess radiation gets vented through here. Vinvocci glass contains it. All five hundred thousand rads, about to flood this thing."

"Oh!" chuckled Wilf. Something clenched, painfully, behind the Doctor's sternum. "Well, you'd better let me out, then."

Yeah, I'd better.

"Except it's gone critical. Touch one control and it floods."

He reached for his screwdriver. "Even this would set it off."

"I'm sorry" Wilf whispered.

"Sure" the Doctor whispered back, blankly.

"Look, just leave me."

What?

"OK. Right then, I will. Cause you had to go in there, hadn't you? You had to go and get stuck, oh yes! Cause that's what you are, Wilfred. You were always this. Waiting for me the whole time!"

"No, really, just leave me" Wilf insisted. "I'm an old man, Doctor. I've had my time."

The thing behind his sternum burned like a star. Old? I'll show you "old".

"Well, exactly" he growled. "Look at you. Not remotely important. But me? I could do so much more!"

Rasillon!

"So much more!"

Rasillon. The one who thinks he's more important than the universe. What would Adelaide say?

"But that is what I get. My reward. And it's not fair!"

His wrists hurt. What am I doing, he thought, looking at the papers he pushed off a desk. Taking Rasillon's road. Poetically speaking. Or, in other words, prattling. And I know I don't want to take this road, so why am I prattling. Trying to buy time, that's what.

"Ooh... lived too long."

"No... No, no, please, please don't, don't..." But the Doctor only glanced at Wilfred.

I could do so much, he thought. See so much. Save so many people.

And none of these things is worth paying the price of this one, old man's life. None. It's not about virtue, theory of courage or however they call this now. It's not about liking him, though I really do. He's smart, brave. And I guess he likes me, too, since he's yelling so much.

"Wilfred" you're worth more than the sum of your merits "it's my honour. Better be quick. Three, two, one."

For a moment the fire in his chest died out. Death gives us meaning, the Doctor remembered with an inward smile. No, not death. I've been so childish just a year ago. Not death. He pressed the button.

Before the pain drowned out all thought, the Doctor saw Wilfred face to face.


End file.
